Let me say something first:

No, I didn’t expect Royce Gracie to beat Matt Hughes. I was rooting for him in my heart, but my intellect told me otherwise - which doesn’t make his loss any less disappointing.

It’s the Monday Morning Locker Room Question that’s being asked all over. Well, at least all over locker rooms whose denizens care about mixed martial arts:

“Why did Royce get beaten so soundly?”

I’m sure I will get a ton of flame-mail for this, but I’m certain of the reason Royce lost -

It’s not “the evolution of MMA and jiujitsu”, unless you call conditioning part of that evolution. Watching Royce during the fight, he was sluggish and made many mistakes in his strategy that I feel were due to his not being in fighting shape. Others have argued Royce was “outwrestled on the floor, where he’s supposed to be the expert,” but I feel it to be that he was dominated on the ground, mostly because he was too tired to make anything happen.

Matt Hughes is in top shape - he’s got a wrestler’s build, and conditioning, to boot. He is powerful and very aggressive (I hesitate to use the word “explosive” even though no other term seems quite as appropo). A man with this much firepower needs to be handled by redirecting that energy or subduing that energy - both strategies require a great deal of mental fortitude, patience, and physical strength. It is my belief that if Royce had come in stronger and better prepared conditioning-wise, he would have lasted the entire bout (although I make no bones about the outcome. As much as I’d like it to be, I just can’t see Royce being able to overcome the power gap in the course of five 5 minute rounds to win the match).

The standup phase of the bout saw both fighters eager to engage in combat but neither one seems to want to commit to any real gameplan. Both fighters (as can be seen from their stances and movements) are looking to take this fight to the floor.

When they finally clinch, Hughes is much too powerful for Gracie. With superior strength and great technique, he is able to control Gracie in the clinch and take him to the ground, landing in side control.

The standing portion of a clinch, prior to a takedown, is arguably the most exhausting range to fight in. It’s possible Royce lost some of his steam here. The knee strikes to the abdomen probably didn’t help.

They work in side control with Royce making one or two attempts to get to guard, use high-leg escape, etc. Hughes works an armbar attempt, nearly cinching it (were it not for Gracie’s incredible flexibility). Gracie gets and loses half-guard. Hughes rear mounts him. It’s all over but the shouting.

Arguably, the end of the fight was when Hughes rear mounted Gracie. Francisco and I were dumbfounded. How could a BJJ black belt let himself get rear mounted? It seems impossible until you watch the replays. Royce, visibly tired, was turning onto his side in transition out of side control. Matt Hughes simply interrupted his spin and slipped a hook in. Royce was turning so slowly that I know he must have been quite tired (to be expected after fighting off an armbar attempt) and when Matt Hughes started slipping the hook in, Royce registered no physical reaction (too tired to fight?).

If Royce came in more conditioned, better able to exhibit anaerobic bursts of power, he might have lasted the round. Maybe rounds 2 through 5 might’ve gone differently. We’ll never know.

In all sports, he who is most conditioned may not reign supreme, but he’s up there. Unless there’s a tremendous gap in technique or skill, conditioning generally factors in as the major player in sports success. It won’t guarantee you the medal (only you as an individual can do that), but it will certainly put you in the running. Conditioning is all-encompassing:

-Strength
-Speed
-Stamina
-Spirit

Royce Gracie is a true warrior. And it is a sad thing when a warrior’s body fails his spirit.

Good luck to Professor Gracie in his next bout.

P.S. Hey, wasn’t this asshole supposed to get Royce into shape? C’mon!

Now, at some point, if you’ve reared a child or two, you must have wondered about the health benefits of toting your baby around. If you were so inclined, you may even have thought to yourself, “Well, I’m certainly strengthening my arms carrying this baby of mine around!”

But I’m fairly certain you’d never made the mental leap to thinking of your newborn bundle of joy as an actual strength training implement.

Mums use kids as exercise tools.

An ingenious idea, to be certain. And what better way to help the mother-child bond than to exercise with the baby? (Ha ha ha - sorry, bad pun.)

I would imagine that “going to failure” on any given set would not be a viable option.

All in all, I’d much rather see this fitness trend on our shores than those damn vibrating machines.

I’ve been sitting on this post for two weeks…

Not literally “sitting”.

A client of mine told me about an ad that was placed in the New York Times by Soloflex. They were advertising their new version of a Whole Body Vibration machine, the SoloflexWBV. Advertised as a less expensive version of the institutional models (the Power Plate), the WBV platform is available for 1/3 of the cost ($395 vs. $12,000).

I’m about done with this New Wave of Whole Body Vibrating Machines. This is an exercise fad I’m surprised took off, and can’t wait for it to subside.

Not to mention that the whole idea of a vibrating platform to do exercise on is bogus anyways. The ads state as much - “If you’re not training with weights regularly, here’s the next best thing.” Well, at least they see the value of weight training.

Soloflex apparently likes this thing so much, they’ve placed pdf files of the WBV’s advertisments on the webpage - now that’s devotion. Alas, the list is conspiciously missing the original ad that my client saw that sparked this entire post topic altogether.

She brought it in for me today. The headline reads:

*ahem*

“OUR NEW CONTRAPTION BEATS YOU INTO SHAPE!”

This is not a joke. I’d scan it and post it if I wasn’t worried I’d get sued by Soloflex Corp.

Well, I guess I’d seen bad ad copy for exercise machines, but this one is my current favorite.

I think I’ll have to pick apart the research for vibrating machines one study at a time. Not that I can access any of the research from their citations page - heh.

You know, if televised soccer games looked more like this, then I’m sure more kids would play it.

I’m know I haven’t been keeping up on my blogging - shame on me.

Yesterday Corrie and I passed by Lincoln Center and saw David Blaine in his fishbowl. In case you haven’t heard, David Blaine is submerging himself underwater for a week, at the end of which he will attempt to break out of 150 lbs of chains while holding his breath for 9 minutes.

Let me answer the most frequently asked questions I get about this stunt:

1) Is this dangerous?

Yes, it is. He could die of hypothermia - if the water is too cold and his core temperature drops below 12 degrees C, then we’ll be in for some entertaining antics as he loses his mind (mental slowing, confusion, and amnesia - “What the hell am I doing in here?”), and some not so entertaining antics as his organs fail and he dies.
Of course, it’s hot as hell for May, and another danger to Mr. Blaine is (hee hee) dehydration and heat stroke. The water is being heated to prevent hypothermia, but the glass in the tank amplifies the sun’s rays, heating the water even further. Being that he’s enveloped in water, sweating isn’t going to do Mr. Blaine much good, since sweat can’t evaporate in water! His core temperature could rise and, well, you know.

2) Are his hands all wrinkly?

I don’t know. He was wearing gloves. But they very well could be.

3) How do they keep the water so clear?

They pass David a tube to “pass” into.

4) What happened to all the fish?

They had to go. It was either them or David. The water temps would have killed the fish; to keep the fish alive would have killed David.

5) Is this magic?

No. It’s an amazing feat. It’s testament to the power of human will and the remarkable progress of science. But it’s not magic.

6) Can a person really hold their breath for 9 minutes?

Why, yes. A person can hold their breath for much longer than that, especially if they don’t mind being a little bit brain damaged afterwards.

By the way, I’m a little perturbed at the sloppy reporting that this whole breath-holding thing is getting. The actual record is 13 minutes and 42 seconds, set by Robert Foster. I think - I haven’t bought the Guinness Book of World Records since 2005.

Come to think of it, I think Tom Sietas did 14 minutes and 15 seconds back in January. I’ll have to check that.

But anyway, couldn’t these reporters have looked it up?

7) Is David Blaine better than Harry Houdini?

That’s like asking if Eddie Van Halen is better than Jimi Hendrix - there would be no Eddie Van Halen without Jimi Hendrix coming along first to play guitar the way he did.

…and Harry Houdini was better.